The belief that women are the sole gatekeepers of sexual purity stems from traditional ideas that unfairly place the burden of chastity on women. This myth is deeply rooted in societal norms where women are expected to embody piety, while men’s sexual exploits are often overlooked or even celebrated. According to these skewed standards, a man with many partners is seen as “desirable,” but a woman engaging in similar behaviour faces condemnation.
The origin of the myth
This belief may have originated from the understanding that women often face greater physical consequences in sexual encounters. Pregnancy, primary caregiving responsibilities, career or educational delays, and post-birth complications like cracked nipples, vaginal wounds, or chronic back pain. These challenges can be life-altering and may explain why society emphasizes purity for women more than men.
Adding to this is the notion that a woman’s value diminishes with the number of sexual partners she has, while the opposite is often assumed for men. This double standard is why some men seek virgins or women with low “body counts” while failing to hold themselves to the same standard.
But this raises an important question: what about the women they defiled? Even more importantly, what about their own impurity? Why would a man who has soiled himself drag his filth into a pure woman? Why would she settle for such a man? Clearly, the worldview doesn’t hold water.
What does the Bible Say?
These worldly perspectives crumble when we turn to the Word of God. According to Genesis 1:27:
"God created mankind in His image; in the image of God He created them; male and female, He created them."
This verse reveals that both men and women are made in God’s image, carrying equal responsibility to reflect His holiness.
Leviticus 20:26 further emphasizes this.
"To me, therefore, you shall be holy; for I, the LORD, am holy, and I have set you apart from other peoples to be my own."
God’s call to holiness is not gender-specific. All of us, regardless of gender, are called to walk in chastity and to ensure that our thoughts, actions, words, and hearts remain pure.
Equal accountability before God
Men, like women, are called to sexual purity. God’s laws don’t discriminate based on gender. The idea that one gender is more responsible for maintaining purity than the other is a lie from the enemy, designed to create division, bondage, and destruction.
The repercussions of sexual sins—such as STIs, emotional wounds, and separation from God—are the same for everyone. Sexual sin hinders our communion with God and introduces setbacks and stagnation in our lives. In eternity, it separates us from God forever.
Do you not know that you are the temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy that person, for the temple of God, which you are, is holy.-1 Corinthians 3:16-17
Walking in Christ’s light
Will you be swayed by the lies of the world or walk in Christ’s perfection? Whether you are a man or a woman, God’s call to chastity applies equally. By embracing the grace of God, we can reject this harmful myth and pursue lives marked by purity. Let us choose to live in the light of Jesus Christ.
